apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I just had sex on a roof
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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