Well apparently he's into motor boating.
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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