i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize