I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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