Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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