I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
