Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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