went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
