Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
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We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!