You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
