This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I could make wine with my vomit
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
