so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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