Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
