You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
