I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Randomize