Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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