Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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