so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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