i permit you to call me
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
