I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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