Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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