you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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