I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Randomize
