what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
