What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Randomize
