that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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