bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Come see our sink grown plant.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
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His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
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So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?