Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
