So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
It's no shave November. This is our time.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
