sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
My vagina just recognized that song.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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