But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Randomize
