smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
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For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
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We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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