spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
he thought i was a dude.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
