you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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