what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize
