Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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