WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
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Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
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On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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