There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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