finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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