is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Randomize
