Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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