The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize
