on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
