It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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