it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I'm like, not good at living.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
