Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
