love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
