Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
