Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
