I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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